Monday, January 20, 2014

Quick Takes – Monday Style


With all the happenings that occurred this weekend, there are other things I need to address.  Maybe I’m fired up because I spent 95% of my weekend time watching sports, or maybe I’m doing actually what I’m supposed to do (honestly it’s both).  Let’s have at it.

Peter Gammons – I read an article on TSN this morning regarding Peter Gammons and his reaction to the line brawl that began in Saturday’s Flames/Canucks game.  Gammon commented that what happened Saturday night is one of the reasons hockey is a “minor sport”.  Wait a damn minute…  Let’s get a couple of things straight.

First of all, Gammons is baseball writer, why does anyone give a rats ass about his thoughts on hockey!?!  Also, while hockey isn’t as popular as baseball is in The States, hockey is a true world-wide sport; baseball just wants to be.

I saw a poll this morning on ESPN about fighting in hockey and 69% of the voters wanted the fighting rules to stay how they are.  Fighting is part of the game, and it doesn’t make it minor sport just because some pretentious asshole in Boston thinks it is.

Maybe Gammons should focus more on who is putting a needle in whose ass to gain a “competitive edge”, not what’s happening in an arena in Vancouver.  Better yet, maybe he should wonder why less and less kids are watching and playing baseball.  I have two nephews (11 & 13), and both of them are part of USA Hockey (in fact I’ll be in Long Island this weekend for my nephew’s High School All-Star Game).  They train and play hockey year-round.  They probably couldn’t name 10 Major League Baseball players.  As someone who played and loves baseball I tried to talk to them about it and they wanted nothing of it.  “It’s slow and boring.”  It’s not just them .  More kids want to play hockey, basketball, and football over baseball.  Shit, more kids are getting into lacrosse. 

How “major” will baseball be when no one wants to play it?  The Olympics already pulled it.  As a big baseball fan it pains me to say all of this, but it’s the truth.

Jamaican Bobsled Team – In case you missed it, the Jamaican bobsled team is making a triumphant return to the Olympics.   They just want you to finance it.  The Jamaicans figure they’ll need about 80K to get to Russia and they need your help.  The website Crowdtilt.com has taken up the cause and has already raised $18,000.  Word on the street is there’s a PayPal account in the works as well.

I don’t want to sound like a dick, but why should anyone kick in some cash to get these guys to Sochi?  I understand Jamaica is a very poor country and people did the same thing for Usain Bolt in 2012 in London, but there’s a difference.  Bolt is the fastest man in the world, and won gold medals.  The Jamaican bobsled team is a novelty.
Look…  I enjoyed the movie Cool Runnings too.  Doug E. Doug is a funny guy and the 1988 Jamaican team was pretty inspiring.  It doesn’t mean I’m going to pay to watch them embarrass themselves.

Darryl Katz – Who is Darryl Katz you might ask?  He’s the owner of the Edmonton Oilers (my beloved hockey franchise).  This afternoon he wrote an “open letter” to the Oilers fan base, attempting to keep the fans at bay. 

If this was actually written by Katz, it was more or less a bunch of hot air.  The initial theme seemed to be oriented toward the rebuild, but in reality it was a letter defending Kevin Lowe.  The Oilers president has taken a lot of heat for rebuilding a team that has no defense.  There are social media pages dedicated to “Fire Lowe”.  Oilers fans are pissed (myself included), and want some type of answer.

Another question I have regarding “Rebuild Year Four”.  If you’re rebuilding a young team, wouldn’t you want some type of consistency?  The Oilers have had three coaches in four years (and people are calling for Dallas Eakins’ head now).  If you’re doing a true rebuild, you don’t change coaches annually.  Young players need consistency and annual changes aren’t conducive for development. . .

The letter was nothing but a written vote of confidence for Lowe. 

Well, I’m done.  I can be reached at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt.  I’m pretty bitter…




The Good, The Bad, The Ugly – January 20th


Damn it was a good weekend.  Not really personally. I don’t think I actually left my house.  That’s okay though.  Between the NFC & AFC Championship Games, the NHL, and basketball (both NBA and college), I didn’t need to.  I was satisfied just sitting on my couch.  Anyway, enough about my exciting social life, what actually went down this weekend?

The Good – Sports Chaos – When most people see the words chaos and sports together they don’t associate it with something good.  I disagree; well unless it’s a soccer hooligan riot (that’s just funny).  Chaos gives fans something to talk about and makes social media websites entertaining.  This weekend I was treated to not just one act of chaos but two.

Two seconds into Saturday night’s Flames/Canucks game a line brawl erupted that would make Reggie Dunlop proud.  Well 8 ejections, 188 penalty minutes, and 19:58 minutes later the real fireworks began.  Canucks coach John Tortorella, still pissed that Flames coach Bob Hartley started his fourth line, tried to go through the Flames to get into their locker room.  Torts was stopped by the Flames Brian McGrattan, and almost got his teeth knocked out by goaltending coach Clint Malarchuk.  Oh, I forgot to mention this game was televised nationally in Canada as part of Hockey Day in Canada (as if Canada needs a dedicated day to celebrate hockey), so it was for all to see.  Torts’s episode resulted in an absolute media frenzy, and it’s probably not going to end well.  He is in New York today meeting with the league and facing discipline.

I know Torts is taking a lot of heat for his actions, and frankly he did go too far, but he was doing what he could to stick up for his club.  Hartley is a world-class jerk (no I don’t know him, I’m basing this on his actions, both past and present), and by starting his 4th line or “goon line” (as ESPN refers to it), he baited Torts into starting his 4th line, knowing it would piss him off (he did tell his players the Flames were starting their “Idiot Line”).  Hartley may be an asswipe, but he’s not stupid.

On to Richard Sherman…  He spun television gold after last night’s NFC Championship game.  In case you missed it, Erin Andrews approached him right after the game to get his thoughts on the Seahawks victory over the 49ers.  Instead of giving the standard cliché bullshit he chose to go the WWE route (if you watch the video Andrews looked both scared and disgusted):

“I’m the best corner in the game! When you try me with a sorry receiver like Crabtree, that’s the result you’re going to get. Don’t you ever talk about me!’

After this little gem occurred my Twitter timeline went Chernobyl (dated reference).  Some of the tweets were pretty funny, but a majority of them had an appalling tone.  People need to relax.  He was pumped up because his team is going to the Super Bowl.  It’s funny how fans complain that players are indifferent, but once someone does show some emotion, he’s an asshole.  Come on…  And before people start thinking he’s a classless thug because he’s a big black guy with dreads, remember he’s a Stanford graduate.  Are you?
  
Sherman had a few more interviews where he didn’t feel the need to hulk-out, but they all had one common theme.  He’s not a fan of Michael Crabtree.
Honorable MentionPeyton Manning – 400 yards and 2 touchdowns in the AFC Championship Game

The Bad – 4th Quarter of NFC Championship Game – Yesterday’s NFC Championship game was one of the best games I’ve watch this season.  It was a tightly played game, where both teams fought hard.  Heck, it pretty much came down to one play.  Even so, the game was three solid quarters and one quarter of crap.  The 4th quarter consisted of four turnovers (three by the San Fran), a gnarly injury, and a terrible officiating call (how could you lay on the ground holding the ball, then not get possession?!?!).  The final turnover can be forgiven (the Sherman tip in the end zone), but the other three were just sloppy play by two normally disciplined teams.  As for the injury, I hope NaVorro Bowman makes a full recovery.  Knees aren’t supposed to bend that way.
Dishonorable MentionWes Welker - Dirty hit on Aqib Talib in the AFC Championship Game

The Ugly – Devan Dubnyk – When I heard the Oilers traded Devan Dubnyk to the Predators for Matt Hendricks, I was happy.  Not because I’m a Hendricks fan (he seems like a tough sonavabitch, but the jury is still out), I hate Dubnyk.  You’d think by his frame (6’5, 210lbs.), he’d be the big goalie everyone wants.  No, he’s an abortion.  Saturday night he made his Predators debut and I was interested to see how he fared with an actual defense in front of him (Shea Weber anyone?).  Well as it turns out he began his Nashville career just how he finished his Edmonton career; TERRIBLE.  Dubes allowed 5 goals on 29 Avalanche shots as the Preds fell 5-4.  Dubnyk is now 11-18-2 with a 3.42 GAA and a .892 Sv%.  Keep up the good work Devan.
Dishonorable MentionEdmonton Oilers – Allowing their league-high 9th shorthanded goal against the Jets

What were your good, bad, and ugly from the weekend?  Drop me a line at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt to see my current Flyers/Islanders tweets.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Kellen Winslow Loves Target; A Little Too Much


I’m starting to become a big fan of Kellen Winslow Jr.  Not for his play on the field, let’s be honest, he’s terrible.  It’s his off-the-field antics that tell me he’s doing something right.  It all started back on November 17th.

Kellen scored himself some synthetic ganja and had a hunkering for some Boston Market (SIDEBAR:  I haven’t done drugs in a while, when did people start making synthetic weed?  More importantly, why does one need synthetic weed?  It’s not like there’s a weed shortage.  If regular ole’ pot isn’t getting the job done, you might have a problem and possibly need to locate a 12-step program).  While I don’t know much about the fake ganj, I too enjoy some Boston Market (I dig the creamed spinach), but let’s get back on track.  Kellen seemed to get lost in route the Boston Market (one can only assume he was way too fucked up to use a GPS, OnStar, or one of the 1,000 other ways you can locate an eatery), so he decided to sit in a Target parking lot and regroup. 

Someone must have called the fuzz (a black man sitting in an Escalade, duh), because they paid his car a visit.  He explained that he was merely lost trying to get some rotisserie chicken.  Even though the cops observed some empty containers, which may or may not have contained a controlled substance they let him go.  That changed a little over a month later.  On December 30th charges were filed against him for possession of his “Mr. Happy” and “Funky Monkey” (those were the apparent names of his fake weed).

Well fast-forward two months (since the date of the original incident)…  It’s now come out that while Winslow was sitting in the Target parking lot he was treating his body like an amusement park.  The woman who called the cops also stated that the “black male in the Escalade” was rubbing his erect penis. 

That’s outstanding…  Seriously…  Outstanding…

I don’t know about you but when I get the urge to rub one out in public I’m more of a Kmart guy, but I digress (we all have needs).  As much as this story makes me want to go out and buy a Winslow Jets jersey, he probably won’t be on the team next year (he wears out his welcome pretty quickly), and I’m not sure if I think these allegations are true.

If he’s in an Escalade, one can only assume its pretty high up off the ground (I’ve yet to see a low-rider version).  Also, if you’re going to jack it in your car, wouldn’t you ease the seat back (according to David Lee Roth you're supposed to)?  So unless this woman is 6’5 with heels on or Winslow’s wang puts Tommy Lee to shame, how did she see the alleged masturbation?

Now the police report did say, that Winslow was wearing sweatpants (which give you quick access, but the danger is fear of pitching a tent), and there was an open container of Vaseline on the console, so I guess the proper paraphernalia was in place, but the only legit way I can see that this woman saw anything is if Kellen decided to give her a sneak peek.

I’m probably thinking about this WAY too much, so I’m going to stop now.  What do you think?  Drop a comment or email me at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt for profane-laced tirades about the Oilers.  

Jay's Take: Flyers give Mason an Extension

Today, the Flyers re-signed goaltender Steve Mason to a three-year contract extension.  The Flyers will be paying him $4.1 million in each of the seasons, and it does not include a no-trade clause.

Jay's Take:  Maybe if I was drinking I'd like this deal more, but it's a "meh".  I've read in a few places the comparison to Ondrej Pavelec.  I can understand why.  Their career stats are almost identical and both of them also give up some terrible goals.  In saying all this, Mase has been the better goalie over the past two years.

In the first two months of this season the Flyers couldn't buy a goal and any points they picked up was a direct result of the play of Mason.  He's a big reason the Flyers are second in the Patrick Division.  On the other hand Pavelec is one of the reasons the Jets have been in the shit.  His numbers are dreadful and he struggles getting in the right position.

Is Mason a franchise goalie?  Not a shot.  Did the Flyers overpay him?  No doubt.  But I can understand why the Flyers did what they did.

It's tough to find a franchise goalie.  After this season the pickings are slim in the free agent market.  The top three are Ryan Miller, Jaroslav Halak, and Jonas Hiller.  Miller would be the ideal choice, but I don't see him signing in Philly.  Halak is still in his 20's, but I can't see him not leaving St. Louis.  That leaves Hiller.  He could be a good fit, but frankly, I think the Flyers are gun shy after the Ilya Bryzgalov disaster.  In Mason they know what they have, and he's a decent stop-gap unitl Anthony Stolarz is ready to take the reigns (the Flyers top goalie prospect).

What do you think of the extension?  Drop a comment or email me at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt.  I may or may not be opinionated.


Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Cubs New Mascot... Terrible

Yesterday the Cubs introduced their first mascot ever.  Meet "Clark" (pictured above), and as you can imagine, Cubs fans aren't happy about it.  I can understand why.  Not just because they've been around for 100 years and never had a mascot.  It's dreadful and creepy.

Aside from the obvious poor drawing skills in "Clark" (he looks like he was drawn by a Hanna Barbera flunkie), might I be the only one who has a problem with that fact it's a child without pants?  I know an arguement can be made for Donald Duck, which is pretty fucking weird in it's own right, but it's different.  Donald debuted in 1934.  So did the rise of Stalin, Hitler, and an overwhelming popularity of lawn jockeys.  Just because it was popular back than doesn't make it okay today.

I know some might argue the Phillie Phanitic lacks pants, but the Phillie Phantic is a bird (at least alleged), not an assumed child.  He's beloved by all; so I'm okay with him.

Am I out of my mind?  Let me know.  Leave a comment or email me at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter for more mindless babble...

Not So Fast Winnipeg…


Last night Paul Maurice made his head coaching debut behind the Winnipeg Jets bench and the Jets had an impressive win over the Phoenix Coyotes 5-1.  This prompted every Jets fan on Twitter to suddenly think all the problems the Jets have are magically gone.  I wanted to start #TheCupIsOurs in hopes it would trend, but I was too busy watching Archer (that was more important).  Now did the Jets play well last night and is Maurice a better coach than Claude Noel?  Yes on both accounts.  Even so, some things need to be factored in.

They beat the friggin’ Coyotes.  Phoenix is a terrible team.  Since the New Year the ‘Yotes have gone 1-5-0.  On their current three game losing streak they’ve been outscored 14-5.  Even worse, undeserving Olympian, Mike Smith hasn’t won a game since December 31st (0-5-0).  Over that span he has a GAA of 3.39 and Sv% of .885 (Canada better pray they don’t need him between the pipes in Sochi).  That’s embarrassing.  So while a victory in Maurice’s first game is nice, it’s not exactly like they beat the Blues, Blackhawks, or Sharks.

This team is flawed on many levels.  Evander Kane is a world-class talent but has the maturity of a seven year-old girl.  This obviously effects his focus.  Dustin Byfuglien is playing forward, but wants to be on the blue line (his natural position).  I get the fact he’s built like a power forward, but the Jets need a big guy on defense.  Adam Pardy has some size, but come on.  He’s Adam Pardy.  I’m a big Andrew Ladd fan and think he’s a good captain, but he’s spending too much time addressing trade rumors about him and his teammates.  It’s effecting his play.  He has one point over his last five games.

What’s really concerning is between the pipes.  Ondrej Pavelec is just bad.  Not Devan Dubnyk bad, but pretty damn close.  Prior to last night’s game, the last time he had a good game was on December 22nd, when he allowed only two goals in a 2-1 loss to the Canucks.  Since that outing he’s had two games where he allowed six goals, and a game where he allowed three goals over seven minutes.  I know he will make a highlight save almost nightly, but the reason for that is because he’s rarely in position.  He forgets where the goal posts are and is forced to dive or sprawl to make the save.  Jets fans, he’s not good.

Now with that being said, a lot of the issues can be fixed.  Maurice will work with his players and the team should improve.  I don’t support the theory the Jets should blow the team up and start a rebuild.  If they dealt Kane or Byfuglien it would be stupid.  If you look around the league, contending teams have a franchise forward, franchise defenseman, and franchise goalie.  The Jets have two of those three covered.  This club would take a step back by parting with either one of them.  Trades indeed need to happen, especially if it upgrades the goaltending disaster.  The tandem of Pavlec/Al Montoya will NEVER win a Jennings Trophy.  Forget the Jennings Trophy they’ll never take the Jets to the playoffs.   If it the Jets need to deal some young players and draft picks to make the goaltending at least respectable it needs to be done.  I just wouldn’t move the core of the team.

It might not sound like it, but I don’t think this is a terrible team.  They have some superstars, and players like Jacob Trouba and Mark Scheifele are only going to get better.  They just need to fix some things before anyone takes them seriously.

And before I start getting hate mail from Jets fans, you all should know that TSR! has supported the NHL in Winnipeg before Atlanta lost their second NHL franchise (that place is the worst).  I’m just calling it how I see it.  I’d rather see good hockey in Winnipeg, then a celebration of a victory over a garbage team.  As an Oilers fan, I know how it is Winnipeg.  I know how it is.

I still want to hear your thoughts.  Hit me up at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt.  #TheCupIsOurs

Thursday, January 9, 2014

And Now the Baseball Hall of Fame…


Yesterday is was announced that Greg Maddux, Tom Glavine, and Frank Thomas will be enshrined into the Baseball Hall of Fame.  It will be the first time since 1999 that three players have been inducted into Cooperstown via ballot.  While all these players are deserving of being held in the highest regard of baseball history, let’s be honest, the Baseball Hall of Fame is joke.

It actually pains me to say that.  When I was a kid there was no place on earth where I wanted to be more than the BHOF.  It was my Mecca.  It was a place full of unforgettable baseball memories and honored the greatest players.  I still like to believe that is what it once was.  It’s not easy.  In reality it’s nothing but a fraud dictated by a bunch of writers who hold themselves in higher regard than the players who have buttered their bread.  Yeah, I’m taking aim at the Baseball Writers Association of America.

The BBWAA are the biggest bunch of jerkoffs in all of sports.  They are nothing but a bunch of fat slobs who have never as much picked up a baseball, yet spell it.  They hold grudges and put their own personal feelings in front of what is best for the game.  They think by doing this they are making a point, yet all they are doing is embarrassing the game I love.

Want an example?  Here’s one.  One of these assholes actually voted for Armando Benitez.  Armando Fucking Benitez.  A journeyman closer who has a losing record and a career 3.13 ERA?!?  He’s more known for beaning Tino Martinez in the 1998 playoffs and then getting the shit knocked out of him by Darryl Strawberry than being a Major League pitcher.  I don’t know who thought it would be funny to vote for Benitez, but he shouldn’t be allowed to cast a vote for his local school board, no less baseball’s highest honor.

While these asswipes vote for Benitez, JT Snow, and Kenny Rogers (who also received a vote), players deserving like Craig Biggio and Mike Piazza will hope they get in next year (it’s not like either of them were Brady Anderson).

Biggio is 1 of 28 players in baseball history who have 3,000 hits.  He excelled at THREE positions (catcher, second base, and centerfield).  He was a seven-time all-star.  Aside from Pete Rose (who belongs in the HOF), and Rafael Palmeiro (who should also receive consideration), he’s the only eligible player with 3,000 hits NOT in the HOF.  He also was never named in any PED allegations.

Piazza was the greatest hitting catcher of all-time.  His career numbers are better than Johnny Bench, Yogi Berra, and Roy Campanella; three who are considered the greatest.  The only time in Piazza’s career that he had to defend himself was that he wasn’t gay.  What he did or did not in his bedroom is not anyone’s business, nor enhanced what he did on the field.

Now I’m not saying that Maddux, Thomas, and Glavine don’t deserve to be in the HOF.  By all rights they do.  It’s just sad that there are players on the ballot for multiple years, while deserving, get overlooked due to an era of PED’s. 

That in its own right is a bunch of bullshit.  PED’s have been used throughout the history of the game.  Fergie Jenkins used cocaine, Ty Cobb used racism, Mickey Mantle used booze, Babe Ruth used hot dogs and broads, and countless others used things like amphetamines to give themselves an edge.  The Steroid Era happened, move on and get it over with.  Like it or not, Roger Clemens and Barry Bonds are Hall of Famers even if they NEVER put a needle in their ass.

I’m sick and tired of these debates about who’s in and who’s out.  If you think Jack Morris belongs in the HOF, you’re idiot.  He’s not a HOF pitcher, but unfortunately he will eventually will be inducted.  Yet baseball’s all-time hit leader, home run leader, arguably the greatest pitcher of all-time, will never be. 

Such an embarrassment…

I know this is a hot debate, so I want to hear from you.  Drop me a line a gimmeasign@gmail.com.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt for more mindless rants.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Jay’s Take – Hockey Canada Selections


This morning Hockey Canada announced their roster that will be representing the Great White North in Sochi next month.  After looking at the roster, it’s unbelievable how stacked it is. Damn, it’s good.  Even so, much like last week when the United States announced their roster, there’s plenty of debate on who made the team and who was snubbed (for lack of a better word).

OFFENSEJamie Benn – Dallas Stars, Patrice Bergeron – Boston Bruins, Jeff Carter – Los Angeles Kings, Sidney Crosby – Pittsburgh Penguins, Matt Duchene – Colorado Avalanche, Ryan Getzlaf – Anaheim Ducks, Chris Kunitz – Pittsburgh Penguins, Patrick Marleau – San Jose Sharks, Rick Nash – New York Rangers, Correy Perry Anaheim Ducks, Patrick Sharp – Chicago Blackhawks, Steven Stamkos – Tampa Bay Lightning, John Tavares – New York Islanders, Jonathan Toews – Chicago Blackhawks

This is a highly-skilled offense heading to Sochi, but it could be better.  Jeff Carter is a good player, but I don’t see him as an NHL elite forward; at least not anymore.  He’s not the same player he was when he was in Philadelphia.  The same goes for Nash. He has been unable to stay healthy this season and is no longer considered a guaranteed 30-goal scorer.  There are more deserving players than Nash who deserve to represent Canada.

Snubs – Given the depth Canada has, it’s hard to pick out a snub most will agree upon but it doesn’t mean they aren’t out there.  I know Claude Giroux struggled coming out of the gate, but the Flyers as a franchise struggled and he was coming off hand surgery.  He’s still regarded as one of the best players in the league.  He not representing Canada is absolute nonsense.

Call me a homer here, but its bullshit Taylor Hall was left off the roster.  Statistically he’s third amongst Canadian left-wingers, only behind Sharp and Kunitz, but I’ll argue all day he’s better than both of those.  Both Kunitz and Sharp play on Stanley Cup contenders and have a cast of all-stars surrounding them.  Hall plays on a dysfunctional team (if you don’t know the Oilers are a dysfunctional team you’re an idiot), where he might have different linemates on any given night.  He’s averaging over a point a game over the past two seasons and at only 22 is a veteran leader on the Oil. 

Other overlooks are Joe Thornton (extensive international experience and is 5th in the league in scoring), and James Neal (averaging 1.42 points a game).  I’d take them over Nash and Carter.  Logan Couture is another player who should have received more consideration but he’s on the shelf for a month with hand surgery.

DEFENSEJay Bouwmeester – St. Louis Blues, Drew Doughy – Los Angeles Kings, Dan Hamhuis – Vancouver Canucks, Duncan Keith – Chicago Blackhawks, Alex Pietrangelo – St. Louis Blues, PK Subban – Montreal Canadiens, Marc-Edouard Vlasic – San Jose Sharks, Shea Weber – Nashville Predators

Looking at the defensive selections, there’s no better group in the World heading to Sochi.  It’s so deep the only US defenseman who could crack this roster would be Ryan Suter.  Yzerman selected a squad of two-way defenseman who are going to make life hell for their opponents.  It sucks when I can’t find something to bitch about.  Thanks Stevie-Y…

Snubs – Brent Seabrook is having a career season.  He’s a plus-22, which leads all Canadian defenseman and his 31 points are only behind Keith and Subban.  I probably would take him over Hamhuis, but I can see the reasoning why Hamhuis was selected to the team.

GOALTENDING – Roberto Luongo – Vancouver Canucks, Carey Price – Montreal Canadiens, Mike Smith – Phoenix Coyotes
                                   
Overall this is a good group of netminders, but it could have been better.  I personally think Price is the best goalie in the NHL right now.  Luongo also adds a lot of international experience and leadership.  Then there’s Smith.  Unless he has naked photos of Steve Yzerman’s wife or some dirt on Mike Babcock, what the hell is he doing on the roster?  Outside of one good season, that was two years ago, he’s a mediocre goalie with career stats similar to Devan Dubnyk.  There’s nothing impressive about a 2.89 GAA.

Snubs – Given the fact Smith made the roster, about 90% of Canadian goalies should feel snubbed but a couple come to mind. Marc-Andre Fleury might be a dog in the playoffs but he has had an outstanding season in Pittsburgh.  His 24 wins are first among Canadian goalies and his 2.23 GAA ranks him third among Canadian starters.

Steve Mason has done a hell of a job for the Flyers, especially considering their offense was non-existent the first two months of the season.  His line of 17-10-4/2.39/.922 is the reason the Flyers have gone from a team in the basement to a playoff contender.  He’s not the sexiest name in the Canadian goalie pool, and I’m sure he wasn’t given any consideration, but he’s still better than Smith.

PREDICTION On paper there’s not a better roster in the world.  From top to bottom each player representing Canada can do damage.  In saying that what’s on paper doesn’t always transpire to what happens on the ice as Russia, Sweden, Finland, and the United States are strong in their own right.  Canada is still the best.  They’re going to beat the United States and win the Gold.

What didn’t you like about the Canadian roster?  Email me at gimmeasign@gmail.com and let your voice be heard.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt.  I’m full of surprises.

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Jay’s NFL Playoff Picks


The NFL Playoffs kick off this afternoon and it has me in a football mood.  It’s probably because the Eagles won the NFC East and have a stake in the post-season action (screw off Cowboys and Giants fans), and Oilers are just too painful to watch.  Since I have nothing going on today except drinking too much coffee, I figured I’d join the legions of fans and media in giving their input with some predictions of my own.

Chiefs at Colts – Under Andy Reid the Chiefs had the biggest turnaround in the league going from the worst team in the league to a Superbowl contender.  I don’t think Reid is the reason for this turnaround, but more so of having a quarterback not named Matt Cassel (they already had a ProBowl defense), but I will give Reid some props.  The Chiefs are a dangerous team with the potential to go deep in the playoffs.

The Colts picked up from where they finished last season and won the AFC South.  With their balanced attack they managed to pick up wins against the 49ers, Seahawks, Broncos, and Chiefs.  They were also blown out by the Rams and Cardinals getting outscored 80-36.  To me those losses outshined all the big victories over playoff teams.

This is a tough call as both teams are very evenly matched.  The Chiefs have an advantage with their running game, but the Colts have the edge with passing.  Normally when teams are this evenly matched the advantage should go to the Colts because they are the home team, but not in this case.  If it wasn’t for a local grocery store, the game wouldn’t be televised locally because there were over 1,200 unsold tickets.  There’s no excuse for that Indianapolis.  For that alone I can’t give you any support.  Chiefs 34 – Colts 17.

Saints at Eagles – The Saints had an admirable season going 11-5, but limped into the playoffs after back-to-back losses to the Rams and Panthers.   This caused them not to win the NFC South, but secure a Wildcard.  Even though they finished the season 1-2, this team is stacked.  Drew Brees is a monster and with the weapons they have, can score at will.

Chip Kelly proved his up-tempo offense could work in the NFL as the Iggles finished the season 7-1, winning the NFC East (10-6).  Nick Foles established him as a bona-fide NFL starter throwing for 27 touchdowns with only 2 interceptions.  LeSean McCoy set an Eagles record for total offense from scrimmage (2,143 yards), and led the NFL in rushing yards (1,604).

For obvious reasons I can’t wait for this game.  This has the makings for a classic shootout.  I think the Eagles are going to struggle to find a way to stop Jimmy Graham and Darren Sproles, but I don’t think the Saints have an answer for McCoy.  Pierre Thomas will not be playing so if the Saints are going to establish a running game it’s going to be up to Mark Ingram.  That’s not going to bode well.  It’s also supposed to be in the low teens here in Philadelphia at game time with some wind, which also doesn’t help a dome team.  This is going to be a high scoring game.  The Saints have never won a road game in the postseason and it’s not going to happen tonight.  Eagles 46 – Saints 41.

Chargers at Bengals – The Chargers made the playoffs by the skin of their teeth (I never really understood that phrase), in Week 17 by beating the Chiefs in overtime and the Dolphins and Ravens losing.  Regardless they are in.  Philip Rivers had an outstanding season (4478/32/11), and I really like the running combo of Ryan Mathews and Danny Woodhead.

The Bengals won the AFC North with an 11-5 record, their best record since 2005 (where they again finished 11-5).  They have a strong offense led by Andy Dalton and AJ Green but this team is winning on defense.  The Bengals rank third overall in total defense and first in the AFC.

This is a tough game to call.  The Bengals went undefeated at home this year, but they haven’t won a playoff game since 1990.  Rivers has a reputation of shitting the bed in the big game, but Dalton has never won a playoff game.  The Bengals are the obvious favorite, but I think the Mathrews/Woodhead combo gets it done.  Chargers 24 – Bengals 17.

49ers at Packers – The Niners 12-4 record was only good enough to clinch a Wildcard as the Seahawks finished 13-3.  Even so, 12 wins is a reflection on this club as they are the most balanced team playing this weekend.

The Packers made the playoffs despite losing Aaron Rogers for seven games.  In those seven games the Pack went 2-4-1.  Rogers is healthy and ready to play.  Eddie Lacy stepped up in his rookie season, finishing 8th in rushing yards.

It’s supposed to be -3 degrees at kickoff tomorrow, so it’s going to be fucking cold.  This is an advantage for the Pack but it’s even cold by Green Bay standards.  The clear advantage between these two teams is the Niners defense.  There might be a couple Lambeau Leaps tomorrow but it’s not going to be enough.  49ers 27 – Packers 17.

Well these are my picks for the weekend.  What are yours?  Email me at gimmeasign@gmail.com and let me know.  Follow my on Twitter @JayPlatt.  It’s full of Oilers complaints.

Friday, January 3, 2014

Jay’s Take – USA Hockey Selections


I wanted to address this earlier, but to be honest, I’ve been lazy and got into an ID Network marathon (the show doesn’t matter they’re really all the same).  Besides I’m glad I waited a bit because it gave me time to actually formulate an opinion (I do that sometimes), not sound like every other half-cocked asshole.

After the Winter Classic, USA Hockey announced their rosters for this February’s Olympics in Sochi and within minutes it spawned debate.  While debate when any team is named is common, in this case, I think a lot of it is overhyped by the gasbags in the media.  At least it gets the fans talking right?

OFFENSE Zach Parise – Minnesota Wild, David Backes – St. Louis Blues, Blake Wheeler – Winnipeg Jets, Paul Stasny – Colorado Avalanche, Patrick Kane – Chicago Blackhawks, Phil Kessel – Toronto Maple Leafs, Derek Stepan – New York Rangers, Joe Pavelski – San Jose Sharks, Ryan Kessler – Vancouver Canucks, James van Riemsdyk, Dustin Brown – Los Angeles Kings, Max Pacioretty – Montreal Canadiens, Ryan Callahan – New York Rangers, TJ Oshie – St. Louis Blues

I really like the offensive lineup.  Kane will be going to Sochi not just as the best American forward, but one of the best forwards in the entire world.  He, along with JVR, Pacioretty, Kessel, and Parise give the US some big scorers.  Players like Callahan, Stasny, Wheeler, and Brown are excellent two-way players who can help the Americans on the power play and the penalty kill.  This isn’t the most offensive US group of forwards, but it’s an outstanding balance, which is more important in international play.

Snubs – The obvious choice here is Bobby Ryan.  Ryan is a perennial 30-goal scorer and was a member of the US’s 2010 team.  I agree he’s probably a better choice than a guy like Stepan, but given the balance on the offense I can see why he was left off.  If I was putting this team together I’d probably take Brandon Saad over Ryan.  Not a knock on Bobby, I just like Saad’s makeup more. 

Another name I’ve heard who was snubbed was Kyle Okposo.  Okposo isn’t a bad forward, but he’s a main benefactor of playing with John Tavares, and don’t see why he would have been given a ton of consideration.

I want to touch on Ryan briefly and the comments directed toward him from Brian Burke.  I know there are a lot of people who aren’t happy Ryan didn’t make the team but why is anyone given Burke any attention here.  He looks like a deranged old man who combs his hair with a pork chop.  He has nothing to do with USA hockey anymore.  He’s a big-mouth who runs one of the worst franchises in the NHL.  Let him talk and continue to let him look like a moron.  The fact the USA Hockey General Manager David Poile is even addressing him and now apologizing to Ryan is pathetic.

DEFENSE – Ryan Suter – Minnesota Wild, Kevin Shattenkirk – St. Louis Blues, Paul Martin – Pittsburgh Penguins, Justin Faulk – Carolina Hurricanes, Brooks Orpik – Pittsburgh Penguins, Cam Fowler – Anaheim Ducks, John Carlson – Washington Capitals, Ryan McDonough – New York Rangers

Hmmm…  What do I think of the defense?  Bluntly, I don’t like it one bit.  No doubt Suter belongs on the team and I do like Shattenkirk, but the rest of the bunch is questionable.  I think Martin has no business even being in the conversation for making Team USA.  He’s not even playing!  He’s been on the IR since late November.  The only reason I can think of he was given a spot was his coach, Dan Blysma will be coaching the Americans and Orpik, who is also on the team, is his normal defensive partner.  Still I think it took a spot away from a player who might have helped the team more.

I can see the reasoning for McDonough, and maybe even Faulk, but I’m not big on Fowler or Carlson.  If there’s a weakness on this team, it’s the defense, not that Ryan isn’t repping his country in Russia.

Snubs – I’m surprised Keith Yandle wasn’t given a roster spot.  Yandle is third among American defenseman in points, second in shots, and is one of the better two-way defenseman in the NHL.  I’d take him over the trio of Martin, Fowler, and Carlson any day of the week.

To me a biggest surprise, not just for the blue line but for entire team, was how Dustin Byfuglien was left off the roster.  Big Buff can do it all.  He can score, step up and play forward, and is a huge physical presence.  I get that most international hockey isn’t as much of a physical game as the NHL, but Byfuglien has a lot more to offer than Faulk, Orpik, or the aforementioned defensemen.  If I had the ability to make one change it would to make sure Byfuglien is wearing red, white, and blue in Sochi.

GOALTENDING – Ryan Miller – Buffalo Sabres, Jonathan Quick – Los Angeles Kings, Jimmy Howard – Detroit Red Wings

Between the pipes is the strongest area for the ‘Mericans.  Quick has been one of the best goalies in the world, and even though he’s been injured, he’ll be ready to play in February.  Miller was the best player on the ice for USA in 2010 and has yet to slow down.  Playing on the last-place Sabres, Miller is still posting a 2.70 GAA and .926 Sv%.  With an actual defense in front of him, he’ll only improve.  Jimmy Howard hasn’t the best season but is good depth and has had success at the international level.

Snubs – While I agree that Howard that provides depth the fact the Ben Bishop didn’t make the cut is ridiculous.  The Lightning netminder is having the best season out of any American goalie.  Not just any American goalie, any goalie.  He’s currently 3rd in wins (21), 2nd in GAA (1.89), and 1st in Sv% (.935) among all starting goalies in the NHL.

I’ve heard grumblings about Craig Anderson being a snub, but that’s just silly.  He’s lucky he’s the starter on the Senators, no-less representing the United States.

PREDICTIONAlthough the most talented players were not chosen to this roster, it’s a very balanced.  I like the combination of skill and grit with some of the world’s top talent between the pipes.  I don’t think it’s the best group of players going to Sochi, but I think this team is more than capable of winning a medal.  I’m thinking Silver, losing to Canada in the Gold Medal game.

What’s your opinion on Team USA?  I know you have one.  Drop me a line at gimmeasign@gmail.com and let me know.  Follow me on Twitter @JayPlatt.  Its chock full of thoughts that come to mind.


New Year’s Thoughts, the State of the Riot!, Etc.


Happy New Year!  Okay January 3rd.  I hope everyone brought the New Year in a happy and safe place.  By happy and safe place I mean waking up in your bed (or the bed of a suitable stranger), not the drunk tank.  Let’s just say I know there’s nothing happy and safe about that (for the record that was years ago).  Well now that the holidays have come and gone, I’m back from a brief hiatus, heavily caffeinated, and ready to tackle the project that is called The Sports Riot!

TSR! – Over the past couple of weeks we’ve encountered a brief stumbling block when it comes to the swell group the hosts TSR!  Chris has been working feverishly to resolve this issue, but to put it bluntly they’re assholes and we’re currently at a standstill.  As a result we’re digressing (we’re pros at that), to our old website, www.thesportsriot.blogspot.com.  This is only a temporary move until we resolve our dispute with our host, or find a new host who aren’t criminals (yeah, I said that).  No need to worry, we’re just going to kick it old skool (are the kids still using that phrase?), for the next week or so.  Thanks for your patience.

With all that being said, I have no access to my Riot! email.  If you emailed me and I didn’t respond, my fault.  This goes for any writers who were ready to start (sorry, I didn’t have your information to contact you).  Until we’re re-hosted, you can hit me up at my personal address at gimmeasign@gmail.com.  No dick pics please.

Winter Classic – Most of you were hungover and barely able to crawl out of bed on New Year’s Day.  I on the other hand was a fully functional adult (I use that term very loosely).  I spent my NYE at home, relaxing, and texting my buddy Fisher.  After 10 cups of coffee, a 7-11 breakfast, and Tweeting too much, I found time to watch the Winter Classic.

Even though I think the NHL is going to the idiot extreme with so many outdoor games this year, I’ve become a big fan of the Winter Classic; this year more so given the matchup.  Both the Red Wings and Maple Leafs are Original Six teams with a ton of history.  The game didn’t disappoint either with the Leafs winning 3-2 in a shootout (yeah, I’ve also become a fan of the shootout).  It doesn’t mean there weren’t things that just annoyed me.
  
  •           The game was ENTIRELY too long.  I understand there were some issues with snow, but each period lasted an hour due to a TV timeout every 30 seconds.  It seemed more like NBC (at least here in the States), took all the advantage they could of the national airtime.  I get they were in competition with every other station that was showing 1 of the 45 Bowl games that were played but don’t hold your audience hostage.  When you’re watching a hockey game you shouldn’t be looking at the clock wondering when the hell it’s going to end.  That’s what I found myself doing.
  •           On the subject of NBC…  I like Mike Emerich.  Doc is a great announcer, but the rest of the NBC crew is brutal.  Mike Milbury’s voice makes me want to beat him with a shoe (which is better than what most Islanders fans would like to do to him), and Pierre McGuire is a chucklehead.  The highlight of the NBC coverage was Pierre discussing warming someone’s “balls” up (at least he finally made it public).  Even after that verbal nugget, his bad still outweighed any good.  It would have been better if Darren Pang was added to the crew (who doesn’t like a “holy jumpin’!"). 
  •           As entertaining as the game was, the “mid-period horn” as an abortion.  Especially when Hendrik Zetterberg was working on a breakaway in overtime.  There’s no doubt the weather in Detroit was terrible (much like everything else in Detroit), but when you’re playing an outdoor game, rules shouldn’t be amended due to weather.  In reality it cost the Wings a point.
  •           Back to the coverage…  When the “cast” ran out of nonsense to talk about regarding the game, the biggest news was the John-Michael Liles/Tim Gleason trade.  On any other day that would have been a “who gives a shit” transaction.  Wednesday is was a major headline.  “Two Broken Toys Traded…  No One Cares.”
  •           I guess I shouldn’t bitch about the NBC coverage so much.  At least they didn’t lose their feed and were able to broadcast the game in its entirety (umm CBC…).


TSR! Resolutions/Predictions - Since 2010, when we started this nonsense I’ve made some Resolutions/Predictions for the New Year.  So here they are!
  •           For the past week I’ve had the Misfit’s song “Skulls” stuck in my head.  By next week it’ll be something by Hall and Oates.
  •           The Superbowl will be the Chiefs/Eagles.  Like always, Andy Reid will be a bridesmaid.  Book it.
  •           I won’t obsess about the growing number of gray hairs in my chin.  Only because I have a full head of hair with no grays.  Sometimes you have to pick your battles.
  •           The Heat will again win the NBA Championship, this time beating the Golden State Warriors. 
  •           Lebron will debate leaving Miami, but no one outside of Cleveland and Miami will care.  No matter what he does he will get murdered by the media.
  •           I will refer to Ben Rothlesberger as a rapist at least 136 times (this is throughout the year).
  •           The Dodgers will beat the Tigers in the World Series.
  •           I will drink less (yeah I say that every year)
  •           Team USA will win the Silver at Sochi with Canada winning the Gold.  Brian Burke will still unnecessarily ridicule Bobby Ryan.
  •           Derek Jeter will retire before the first game of Spring Training.
  •           I will lose 20 more pounds (I lost 30 in 2013).
  •           The Blues will in their first-ever Stanley Cup over the Flyers.
  •           I will spend much time in Canada.  I’m not going to relinquish my US citizenship (still debating that), but will enjoy friends and work.  Maybe next year I’ll relinquish those rights.
  •           The Sports Riot! will be your favorite place to go on a daily basis.
  •           I will say goodbye to the East Coast.  San Jose, here I come!

 What are you looking at in 2014?  Email me at home at gimmeasign@gmail.con and let me know.  Hit me up on Twitter @JayPlatt.