Sometimes here at The Sports Riot! we feel the need to stick up for the little guy. You know what I mean right? I’m not talking about the kid on the playground who gets picked on. Lets be honest, the kid probably had it coming to him for being a giant wuss. I mean the guy we all want to love, but due to stupidity he becomes Public Enemy #1. Frankly, I find that to be bullshit. Not because I agree with what chucklehead stunt the little guy did, but it’s usually something we’d like to do ourselves and it’s probably funny. So I’m taking it upon myself to stick up for a former NHL player, coach, general manager, and television analyst, because he needs my help. So Mike Milbury, I’ve got your back.
If you’re unsure who Mike Milbury is, he currently was placed on leave as an analyst for NBC Sports and CSN’s Hockey Night in Canada while he resolves some pending legal problems. His unfair suspension was because of an outburst he had at his son’s pee-wee hockey game that resulted in him being arrested for assault and battery on a 12-year-old, along with threatening to commit a crime (if that’s a real offense we should all be in the joint), and disorderly conduct.
While this might sound like unruly behavior for a 59-year-old man, it’s not as bad as it seems.
It all started when Milbury was trying to be a good dad and was coaching his son’s pee-wee hockey club. Young Jake Milbury got into an on-ice altercation with the “victim”, and a ruckus broke out. Being a good dad, Milbury ran on the ice, split up the fray, then proceeded to threaten and shake the “victim”.
Honestly, I really don’t see what the big deal is. Isn’t it commonplace in today’s society for parents to go balls out nuts at a child’s sporting event? I’m under the impression it happens fairly regularly, and makes the game more entertaining, because lets be honest, watching a 12-year-old play any sport isn’t good. All the kids suck and most of the time they have no idea what is going on. As someone watching that junk, I want to be entertained. Hell, I’ve been known myself to grab a cold six pick and catch me some little league, in hopes that two overzealous dad’s beat the shit out of each other because of a close play at the plate. It’s no different than going to a NASCAR race waiting and for a 15-car wreck. There’s nothing wrong with it, it’s a part of life.
While some might be outraged over his behavior, he’s done something that every adult wants to do to a 12-year-old; shake the shit out of them.
Now that Milbury has been suspended from his gig as an analyst for NBC Sports and CBC watching national televised hockey won’t be the same. Milbury has spent a career helping the NHL. As a player he was one of the league’s best defenseman. While coaching the Bruins he won a Presidents Cup. All that doesn’t compare to his analytical viewpoints he gives on TV. The man is a verbal goldmine. If you’ve never heard some of the proverbs that have come out of his mouth, let me enlighten you.
“It’s too bad he lives in the city. He’s depriving a village of a good idiot.” – when referring to Paul Kraus, agent for Ziggy Palffy
“I’m so disappointed they came with their Eurotrash game.” – when describing the 2010 Russian Olympic Hockey Team
“Uwe Krupp is asking his guys to basically be fire hydrants and they’re getting peed on right now.” – when referring to the 2010 German Olympic Hockey Team
“The kid’s playing like he’s sniffing glue” – when referring to defenseman Eric Brewer
“I never got to do it either, but I’m not going to cry.” – when referring to Jeremy Roenick crying after the Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup
“Thelma and Louise.” – when referring to the Sedin brothers
“It’s unbelievable that after more than 30 years in the game, my legacy is for beating a guy with his own loafer. I guess it’s better than having no legacy at all.” – when referring to his NHL legacy and how in 1979 he beat Rangers fan John Kaptain with his own shoe
These are only a handful of the gems that have come out of the mouth of Milbury. The guy is pure genius, and I still haven’t got to real genius when it comes to him. His legacy with the New York Islanders.
Milbury was the General Manager for the Islanders for a ten-year stint and shaped the Islanders into the on-ice juggernaut they are today. Some of his more memorable moves were:
- Trading Roberto Luongo and Olli Jokinen to the Florida Panthers for Mark Parrish and Oleg Kvasha.
- Drafting Rick DiPietro to replace Luongo, passing over the likes of Danny Heatley and Marian Gaborik.
- Trading Zdeno Chara, Jason Spezza, and Bill Muckait for Alexei Yashin.
- Trading Bryan McCabe, Todd Bertuzzi, and a draft pick for a vintage Trevor Linden and Jarkko Ruutu.
To be honest I don’t understand why there’s not a statue of Milbury in front of Nassau Coliseum. I’m sure there’s some ill-informed Islanders fans who thinks that Mike made some questionable moves during his stay with the Islanders, but I disagree. Have you seen the entertaining hockey they’re playing in Long Island these days? Islander fans should count their lucky stars that they had a GM like Milbury who cared enough about their franchise he would do all he can to improve it.
I understand I might be in the minority here, but I’m in Mike’s corner (and you know you are as well). He’s a brilliant analyst, top-notch father, and one hell of a front office employee. He’s the kind of guy I’d drink beer with.
What are your thoughts? You know you secretly agree with me. Shoot me an email at thesportsriot@yahoo.com and give me your thoughts. Don’t forget to follow us on twitter @TheSportsRiot. We aim to please.
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