MLB All Time Disappointment Team

Too many times as sports fans we focus on the hero.  We relish in talking about the extra inning walk-off home run, the dominant pitching performance, and the careers of players who have become our favorites.  In doing this we all overlook some of the hidden gems of the game.  You know what I’m talking about; the free agent signing that never panned out, the trade that went down the wrong way and the guy the imploded your favorite team, the prospect who never lived up to his potential, or the guy who makes you scratch your head and actually wonder how he has a job in Major League baseball. 

Well here at The Riot!, we think it’s time that these players got their due.  They need a little love or hate too (depending how you look at it).  So it got me thinking, who would I put on an all scrub team?  Who has shit the bed so bad over their Major League career that they deserve my glorification?  So I made me a team, oh and it’s a bad team.

Don’t get me wrong, the players about to be presented might have been terrible on the team they played for but I still might have had some ray of sunshine in their career’s.

Catcher

Kenji Johjima (Mariners 2008-2009)

Johjima was the best catcher in Japan for the better part of ten years.  A former MVP and nine-time All-Star, Johjima signed a contract with the Seattle Mariners becoming the first Japanese catcher to join Major League Baseball. 

Like with Ichiro, the Mariners were hoping they caught lightning in a bottle.  They couldn’t have been more wrong.  While Johjima’s first two seasons in Seattle were relatively productive, his final two were a complete abomination. 

After the 2009 season Johjima opted out of his contract and returned to Japan.

Dishonorable Mention:  AJ Pierzynski (Giants - 2004)

First Base

Mo Vaughn (Mets, 2002-2003)

Vaughn was one of the most feared hitters with the Red Sox in the mid-90’s where he garnering three All-Star nods and one MVP award, prompting the Angels to sign him to a six-year, $80 million contract. 

Vaughn disappointed in Anaheim.  A terrible attitude made him a clubhouse cancer and injuries hindered his performance, causing him to miss the entire 2001 season.  

After the 2001 off-season, then Mets general manager Steve Phillips watched Vaughn hit off a tee and deemed him the first baseman of the Mets future (tee ball determines all).  The Mets acquired “The Hit Dog”  and his bloated contract for number one starter, Kevin Appier. 

Well like all Mets roster moves, this was another disaster.  Vaughn arrived into his first training camp a fat f*ck (his “listed” weight was 275), and was a media distraction because he needed to tell the media “how he really felt”.  In two seasons with the Mets he batted .249 with 29 home runs and 87 RBI’s before his career ended due to a knee injury (weak knees can’t hold fat guys).

Dishonorable Mention: Glenn Davis (Orioles, 1991-1993)

Second Base

Steve Sax (White Sox, 1992-1993)
Sax had arguably come off his best professional season when the Yankees sent him to the White Sox for Melido Perez and Bob Wickman. 

While Perez was nothing but a sub-.500 starter and known more for his antics with his batshit crazy brother Pascal and Wickman was nothing more that a middle reliever before becoming a solid closer; Sax shit the bed on the south side of Chicago. 

The former All-Star second baseman, whose career average was .287, batted a lowly .236 in two seasons.

Dishonorable Mention:  Matt Bush (Padres, Well… Never)

Third Base

Adrian Beltre (Mariners, 2005-2009)

Beltre has arguably one of the best season’s a third baseman has had in Major League history.  In 2004 Beltre batted .334 with 48 home runs and 121 RBI’s causing the upstart Mariners to sign him to a five-year, $64 million contract. 

While he continued to play good defense, he was a total bust.  He never batted over .276 or had more than 26 home runs and never eclipsed 100 RBI’s, essentially stealing from the Mariners.

Shame on the Mariners front office.  Never base a contract off a contract year.  In a way they deserved it.

Dishonorable Mention:  Andy Marte (Indians, 2006-2010)

Shortstop

Steve Jeltz (Phillies, 1983-1989)

Jeltz was one time a Phillies top prospect.  I remember actually having his Donruss “Rated Rookie” card (see above).  Jeltz’s best season in Philadelphia was when he hit .243 with four home runs and 25 RBI’s.  That looks pretty solid considering his career average was .210.  He actually had three seasons in Philadelphia where he batted under .200.  Take that Mario Mendoza.

What did the Phillies expect here???  A black guy from France with a Jerri Curl isn’t exactly Ernie Banks. 

Dishonorable Mention:  Rafael Santana (Mets, 1984-1987)

Outfield

Sammy Sosa (Orioles, 2005)

“Slammin’ Sammy” was a fixture on Chicago’s North Side from 1992-2003.  A seven-time All-Star, Sosa was a cog in people returning to watching baseball after being soured by the strike in 1995.  His 450 foot home runs followed by a mildly retarded bunny-hop had people watching every at bat.

In 2004, Sosa had a falling out with the Cubs organization and became too much of a distraction.  After the season they sent Sosa to the Orioles for Dave Crouthers, Mike Fontenot, and Jerry Hairston Jr. 

Orioles fans were stoked.  Already with the power hitting Rafael Palmiero, Sosa was the missing bat the Orioles needed. 

While Crouthers retired as a minor leaguer and Fontenot and Hairston have had somewhat productive careers as utility players, this should have been a coup for the Orioles.

Wrong…

Sosa was a total abortion in Baltimore, battling injuries, the player with Hall of Fame numbers batted .224 with 14 home runs and 45 RBI’s.  He also forgot how to speak English.  Just ask Congress.

To put salt on the wound after taking a year off Sosa signed with the Rangers and hit 21 home runs while driving in 92.  F*ck you Sammy…

Dishonorable Mention:  Jayson Worth (Nationals, 2011 - ???)

Outfield

Ken Phelps (Yankees 1988 – 1989)

While not an offensive juggernaut, Phelps was a serviceable player.  In five full seasons Phelps hit over 20 home runs four times (the one time he didn’t was due to injury).  The always aggressive Yankees felt that Phelps could be the missing piece to the puzzle so they traded prospect Jay Buhner for Phelps.

A total backfire.  Phelps was a mess in New York.  In parts of two seasons Phelps batted .240 and had 17 home runs.  Buhner on the other hand had a solid career with the Mariners having three seasons with over 40 home runs and an All-Star birth.

Damn, I miss the 1980’s Yankees front office.

Dishonorable Mention:  Greg Vaughn (Rays 2000 - 2002)

Outfield

Adam Dunn (2011 - ???)

Dunn is an interesting case.  A premier power hitter, but really he gives you all or nothing.  He will crush the ball but he’ll strike out a lot, and will never win a batting title.  From 2004-2008 Dunn had at least 40 home runs.  He followed that up by spending two years in Washington where he hit 38 home runs in each season. 

Even though he strikes out a ton and have never hit for average it prompted the White Sox to sign Dunn to a four-year $56 million contract, I mean chicks dig the long ball.

Dunn isn’t giving the chicks the long ball they crave.  In fact he’s become a two pump chump, and no chick digs that.  Through 99 games Dunn is batting .161 with 11 home runs and 40 RBI’s.  Considering Paul Konerko consistently puts up big power numbers as did Jim Thome is his time in Chicago, you can’t blame the park.

While it’s too early to really add him to this list, I really don’t care.  Adam Dunn is a scrub.

Dishonorable Mention:  Danny Tartabull (Phillies, 1997)

Starting Pitcher

Adam Eaton (Rangers 2006)

I’ve never been an Adam Eaton fan.  Personally the guy has failed wherever he has gone, and the above mentioned Melido Perez triumphs Eaton’s failed career.  Eaton makes this list, not because I think he’s a total shit, but because of he being the centerpiece and a big one-sided trade.

There have been plenty of one sided trades like then AJ Pierzynski to the Giants for Francisco Liriano and Joe Nathan or Bartolo Colon to the Expos for Grady Sizemore, Cliff Lee, and Brandon Phillips.  At the time these teams acquired players that helped their team and sacrificed prospects.  That is the chance you take in a playoff run.  My issue is the Rangers gave up All-Stars and Eaton did jack shit.

Eaton was traded to the Rangers for Adrian Gonzalez and Chris Young.  Eaton went 7-4 with a 5.14 ERA while Gonzalez has become one of the most feared hitters in the American League (and at one point the National League), and Chris Young went 34-25 and earned an All-Star birth.

Dishonorable Mention:  Kei Igawa (2007-2008)

Starting Pitcher

Danny Jackson (Cardinals 1995-1997)

Jackson was a key starter for the Phillies in their World Series appearance in 1993.  In 1994 he had a more dominant season going 14-6 with a 3.23 ERA.  In the 2004 offseason Jackson signed a three-year $10.8 million contract with the Cardinals. 

Talk about a mistake…

Jackson only lasted two seasons in St. Louis going 4-15 with a 5.48 ERA before being traded to the Padres.

Dishonorable Mention: Carl Pavano (Yankees 2005 – 2008)

Starting Pitcher

Storm Davis (Royals 1990-1991)

Although coming up with the Orioles, Davis found success as part of Tony La Russa’s pitching staff in the late 80’s.  In two seasons Davis with the Athletics, Davis went 38-21 and once free agency came he was a pitcher in demand.

The Royals, who haven’t been relevant since 1985 wanted to make a splash and signed Davis to a three year deal.  They were hoping “Storm” (his birth name is George), would take the region like an F-5 tornado ripping through a trailer park.  They hoped wrong… 

Davis lasted only two season in Kansas City before being dealt to the Orioles.  In his two years Davis went 10-19 with a 4.85 ERA.  The first season he was back with Baltimore he went 7-3 with a 3.43 ERA.

Dishonorable Mention:  Andy Hawkins (Yankees 1989 - 1991)

Starting Pitcher

Jason Schmidt (Dodgers)

Schmidt was one of the best pitchers in the National League for the Giants in the early to mid-90’s.  Over six seasons his 78-37 record with a 3.36 ERA earned him three All-Star nods and was an annual contender for the Cy Young Award. 

The Dodgers needed and ace and thought Schmidt fit the mold and inked him to a three-year $45 million contract.  That didn’t end well.  Upon his arrival in LA, Schmidt developed arm problems that kept him on the disabled list.  In his three seasons with the Dodgers, Schmidt only pitched 10 games in which he went 3-6 with an ERA over 6.00.

Dodger fans are still cursing him to this day.  I do as well.  Not because of his shit performance in LA, but his goatee.  I loathe the goatee.

Dishonorable Mention: Barry Zito (Giants 2008 - ???)

Relief Pitcher

Jose Mesa (Phillies 2001-2003)

Sadly, “Joe Table” (how he’s referred to in Philadelphia), is the Phillies all-time save leader.  No other closer since 1883 has had more than 112 saves like Table does.

It doesn’t mean he’s a good pitcher, and maybe I’m biased here because I HATE “The Table”, but when your all-time saves leader was 13-18 with a 4.03 ERA, he’s not exactly Rollie Fingers.

Besides, I’ve always found him quite disturbing to look at.

Dishonorable Mention:  David Herndon (Phillies 2010 - ???)

Relief Pitcher

Mark Davis (Royals 1990 - 1992)

In 1989 Davis was the best closer in baseball.  With the Padres he was 4-3 with a 1.85 ERA and a league high 44 saves, winning the National League Cy Young Award.  He was the first closer since Steve Bedrosian to win this award, and only the second closer since (Dennis Eckersley in 1992).

The Royals, trying to make a splash, sign Davis.  Much like all players who go to Kansas City his career died.  Davis was a total mess for the Royals going 9-13 with a 5.31 ERA and only 7 saves.  This was over three seasons.

Dishonorable Mention:  Danys Baez (Phillies 2010-2011)

Relief Pitcher

Joel Zumaya (Tigers 2006 - 2010)

I loved Zumaya when he first came up with the Tigers.  He threw 100 MPH, and had all the tools to be the best closer in baseball for years to come.  The Motown City was stoked about this.

In unfortunately Joel wasn’t.  His true passion was Guitar Hero, not pitching.  His obsession with Guitar Hero actually exceeded his love for pitching.  Zumaya was placed on the disabled list due to an arm injury from playing Guitar Hero.

Are you serious???  This has to be the only video game induced disabled stint in the history of baseball.

Since the injury Zumaya has become an afterthought.  Poor Joel…

Dishonorable Mention:  Danys Baez (Orioles 2007-2009)

There you have it, practitioners of Advanced Fandom.  Agree?  Disagree?  I want to hear from you Rioters!  Hit me up at shatmeself@yahoo.com.